GENESIS 21 GOD CAN HELP BROKEN FAMILIES2018 Teaching by Jerry B Simmons

Teaching Transcript: Genesis 21 God Can Help Broken Families

You are listening to FerventWord, an online Bible study ministry with teachings and tools to help you grow deeper in your relationship with God. The following message was taught by Jerry Simmons in 2018. This morning as we look at Genesis chapter 21, I've titled the message, God Can Help Broken Families.

It's a message, I pray, of encouragement for you that God can help, that in the midst of the brokenness that you might see, that you might experience, that you might feel in your own families, that you would look to the Lord and recognize that God can help.

Help. You know, family issues are things that we all face. I was spending some time yesterday. We had a board meeting at another church that I'm on the board at over at Calvary Chapel into the light.

and spending some time with the pastors there and discussing some of the different things happening in their own lives, but also in the lives of the people within the church. And we were reflecting on just the difficulties that we face as members of different families and the variety of circumstances that are there and the pressures and the things that we face that are most of the time, the hardest things that we face and the hardest relationships that we have are

are in the midst of our own families, aren't they? That most of the difficult relationships that you experience are, you know, not so much your enemies, except for those of your own household, right? Those of your own family. It's maybe in the immediate family that you're facing this idea of brokenness and difficulty, or maybe a little bit extended, you know, with cousins, or aunts, or uncles, or parents, or, you know, it might be a variety of different members, but

But many times it is those who are close to us in our families that there's so much difficulty there. There is so much pressure there. There is so much that we have to face and deal with. And this morning, as we look at Genesis chapter 21, and we see Abraham's family, we see that

We see that this is not something new, like all of a sudden in 2017 or 2018, I guess now, that, you know, out of the blue, all of a sudden we're facing family issues, that we're facing things that nobody's ever faced before. But actually, as you look at Abraham's family in chapter 21, I think you could recognize a lot of things that you see in your own family and that you've experienced yourself, that there are a lot of difficulties. And yet in the midst of that, God can help.

And God can show up and he can provide direction and answers and solutions. And so it's really important for us to recognize that God can help. God wants to help. And we have the opportunity to hear from him for our own families in the situations that we face. And so we're going to work through this passage here in three points that we'll look at here in Genesis chapter 21. We begin with verses one through seven. And point number one is God can give laughter to

to a hopeless family. God can give laughter to a hopeless family. Now we're jumping on the scene here. It's kind of in the middle of Abraham and Sarah's life, but they're old. They're really old by this point. And they have been waiting for a long time for the fulfillment of the promise that God had said that he would give them a child. Jumping into verse one, it says, "'And the Lord visited Sarah as he had said, "'and the Lord did for Sarah as he had spoken.'"

Here as we look at chapter 21, we're seeing the fulfillment of something that God had said. And as we talk about God helping us in the midst of our brokenness within our families, we're

that there's kind of three things I'll be reiterating throughout our time together as far as our participation in the work that God wants to do. And the first thing I want to encourage us to do in regards to our families this morning is to hear from God. Notice how much God is speaking as we see in verses one and two. It says in verse one, the Lord visited Sarah as he had said.

And so we find that, even if you haven't been reading along with us, we find that, you know, God has been speaking to Sarah. He has been speaking to Abraham that this is not a birth that takes place that they weren't expecting, but this is something that God has told them about. And they've been listening to God. They've been hearing from God. At the end of verse one, it says, "...the Lord did for Sarah as he had spoken."

And you get the understanding here that God has prepared the way for these events, even though they are unusual, even though it is not expected in an external sense, but

But God has prepared the way with his word. He has spoken to Abraham and to Sarah. In verse 2, it says that all this took place at the set time of which God had spoken to him. So God had told him about the events and told him about the timing of the event. It was just as God had said, which means that

Abraham has been hearing from God and Sarah has been hearing from God. And this morning, I want to encourage you as we talk about families and the issues within our families, this is something very important. We need to hear from God.

And as we relate to and minister to and seek to navigate the difficulties of our family relationships, we need to hear from God about those things and not just operate based on, you know, our experience or what our grandma taught us or those kinds of things, but to hear from God about our situations.

And so this is what we see, first of all, for them as they hear from God. But then moving on to verse three and four, it says that Abraham called the name of his son who was born to him, whom Sarah bore to him, Isaac. Then Abraham circumcised his son Isaac when he was eight days old as God had commanded him.

And so going along with the idea of hearing from God, next we see that they were involved in obeying God. And this is the second part as far as our part in God ministering to our broken family that we need to hear from God and then put into practice and put into action the things that God is saying and obey God.

God. Notice how much Abraham is obeying God here. It tells us in verse 3 that Abraham called the name of his son Isaac. He named him Isaac, not Abraham Jr. Why? Because

I mean, every Abraham wants an Abraham Jr., right? Why did he name him Isaac instead of something else? Well, in Genesis chapter 17, verse 19, the Lord, when he had spoken to Abraham, he told him, Sarah, your wife will bear you a son and you shall call his name Isaac. I will establish my covenant with him for an everlasting covenant and with his descendants after him.

Why did Abraham call his son's name Isaac? Because God said, call your son's name Isaac. There's a son I'm going to give you. It's a son that I'm promising you. And here's what I want you to do. Call his name Isaac. And so what we find is that Abraham does that. It's a simple step of obedience. This is not, you know, radical faith required here. It's just he heard from God about this name. And so he put into practice and he named his son Isaac as God had instructed him.

And then we also see Abraham obeying God in verse 4. It tells us, This is also in obedience to what God had told him. In Genesis chapter 17 verse 12, we see there when God in chapter 17 gave Abraham the covenant of circumcision,

He gave him some specific instructions about it. In 1712 of Genesis, he says, he who is eight days old among you shall be circumcised. Every male child in your generations, he who is born in your house or bought with money from any foreigner who is not your descendant. So everybody in your house, when they're eight days old on their eighth day anniversary, you are to circumcise the males at eight days old. And so what do we find happen here in these first couple of verses?

Abraham obeys God. He hears from God and then he obeys God. Sarah is part of this as well. She hears from God and she obeys God. Then verse five tells us Abraham was 100 years old when his son Isaac was born to him. And Sarah said, God has made me laugh and all who hear will laugh with me. She also said, who would have said to Abraham that Sarah would nurse children for I have born him a son in his old age.

Here in verses five through seven, we kind of get to the core idea of the point, and that is God can give laughter to a hopeless family. Here they're expressing the hopelessness that they felt and the shock that it is, the miracle that has taken place that Abraham and Sarah have given birth to a son, named him Isaac, and the name Isaac means laughter. Laughter.

And so Sarah says, God has made me laugh and all who hear will laugh with me because God has given me laughter. He's given me Isaac. Who would have thought, who would have ever said, who would have ever imagined this is way more crazy and miraculous than anyone would have ever expected that Sarah would nurse children, that I would be able to give birth to Abraham and

of a son in his old age. There's a description here. There's a little bit of an implication about the hopelessness of their situation in regards to having a son.

And to understand the hopelessness, you might be familiar with it because we, you know, we are familiar with the book of Genesis, but I would encourage you just to kind of try to put yourself in their shoes for a little bit. Put yourself in their mindset for a little bit and let's go back, not, you know, for a long period, but just kind of go back in our minds and rewind back in our minds to Genesis chapter 12.

there, God gave Abraham a call. He says, get out of Haran, the place where you're in, get away from your family and go to the land that I will show you. And we find in Genesis chapter 12, verse four, that when that happens and as God gives him that word and calls him out, he is 75 years old when he departs from Haran. At that time, Sarah is 65 years old. Now,

We're familiar with the book of Genesis, and we know it wasn't, you know, that far back in the book of Genesis that people were living to 900 years old, right? So maybe 75 and 65 sounds old to us, but it wasn't that old for them. No, actually, that all changed with the flood, and that was several hundred years before, and now there's been generations since the flood, and while living in

more than a couple hundred years, is not the norm. It's not the standard any longer. Things have changed. And so at 75 years old and 65 years old, Abraham and Sarah are old.

Now they're going to go on to live for some time. So it's a little bit different than what we're used to, you know, but it's also not the same as, you know, 900 years old. It's kind of that in-between, that phase out of those longer periods of time. And they truly are old by this time. And yet in Genesis chapter 12, God gives Abraham a promise and says, I will make you a great nation. I'm going to give you many descendants, Abraham.

And so they go out of Haran with this promise, Abraham being 75, Sarah being 65. It's kind of late, you know, if you wait till you're 75 to start a family, you know, they didn't have any children yet, but God says, I'm going to give you children. I'm going to give you many descendants. And the promise was given when they were 75 and 65 years old. And so they leave Haran, they go down to the promised land and they spend some time down there, but about 10 years passes, 11 years passes.

And still no hint, no evidence, no sign of any great descendants or great nation that is to come from them. And so, well, Abraham and Sarah hatch a plan and they decide we're going to make this happen. In Genesis chapter 16, we find that Hagar, Sarah's handmaiden, is given to Abraham. And through Hagar, Abraham has a son and they name him Ishmael.

Now it tells us in Genesis chapter 16, verse 16, that this takes place when Ishmael is born. Abraham is 86 years old. So it's 11 years after they left Haran. They waited 10 years. They didn't see that promise fulfilled. They didn't see any evidence of, you know, God at work in the midst of that. And so Sarah is 76. Abraham is 86. And they give birth to Ishmael. Now they have a son.

but it's not the son that god promised when god promised to make them a great nation that wasn't the way that god had in mind that wasn't what god had planned that was their approach but they were hopeless

Nothing was happening. There was nothing they could do. In those days, you know, there was no doctors that they could go visit. There was no exercises that they could do. You know, you just got to like do this exercise or do these crunches or, you know, take this medication or whatever. There was no techniques that they could try that they hadn't tried before, you know, in the previous, you know, 80 years of their marriage or however long they've been married. I guess 80 years would be a bit much, but you would get the point, right? They tried everything, right?

And they were hopeless. There was no way that this could take place. There was nothing they could do except they thought up this plan, and so maybe we'll have a child this way. Later on, God shows up again and says, that wasn't my plan. In fact, I still want to make good on my original promise. And so we find in Genesis chapter 17 that God speaks to Abraham again. That's when he gives him the covenant of circumcision. And he says,

And it's when he confirms, I'm going to give you a son through Sarah. In Genesis chapter 17, we find in verse 16 and 17 that this all takes place. Abraham gets this promise of a son through Sarah specifically. And the covenant of circumcision, it happens when Abraham is 99 years old. And so at that point, Sarah is 89 years old. And by that point, it's 13 years later. Ishmael is 13 years old. And so some time has passed.

And probably they assumed, they thought, well, we accomplished what we needed to accomplish. We got a son. Wasn't the way that we thought, but hey, there's Ishmael. So, you know, the great nations are going to come. That's what God said. And so they probably thought, okay, we took care of it. But God shows up and says, no, you haven't taken care of it.

You were hopeless, and so you tried to take care of it yourself, and you thought you had it fixed, but you were more hopeless than you realized because that's not what I meant. That's not what I had in mind. But God says, I'm going to give you a son now. And now Abraham, he's not younger now. He's older now, right? It's 13 years after Ishmael, 11 years before that. It's 25 years later from when he left Haran.

Then in Genesis chapter 21, verse 5, it tells us Abraham was 100 years old when his son Isaac was born to him. Now think about what Sarah says. God has made me laugh and all who hear will laugh with me. She also said, who would have said to Abraham that Sarah would nurse children for I have born him a son in his old age. The point is they were hopeless. There was nothing they could do to make this happen.

They had no hope. They had exhausted their resources. They had exhausted everything that they, you know, all of their attempts, everything that they could think of. And keep in mind and understand that during these 25 years, this was not just, okay, you know, 25 years past, you know, we look through 25 years of their life and it just goes through a couple of pages in the Bible, right? But think about 25 years of your life.

Now, if you're old like Dave, you might say, well, 25 years, right? That's just gone by like this. But I look back 25 years. I'm like, this is taking forever to go 25 years. I can't even imagine 25 years ahead. Like, that's just like, it feels like forever. That's never going to happen. I mean, it just is so much time. And when you're living out that 25 years in a condition that

Well, there's a hopelessness, then the time feels extra long, right? Keep in mind that barrenness in those days and in their culture, it was shameful. It was hard. It was very difficult. This was not something that was just like, oh, well, you know, I guess it's just not in the cards for us, you know? No big deal. No, there would be shame. And, well, I don't want to get into that. Okay, but

There would be hardship, heartache, difficulty. And so this idea of hopelessness, it was, there was a very real sense of hopelessness that they would have experienced. But then God gave them laughter. And you know, there are many families who have experienced situations, whether it be related to children and not having children or having children or those kinds of things or some other situation. But there are things that families face where

It would be easy to be like Sarah and think, I will never laugh. I'll never laugh again. We're never going to have that joy that we once had. There's been so many years of difficulty. There's been so many trials and so many things that have weighed upon us. That laughter, it's just unthinkable. Who would have imagined that we could laugh again, Sarah says.

And families face those kinds of difficulties. We experience those kinds of tragedies. And this morning, I want to encourage you and remind you that God can give laughter to a family that thought they would never laugh again. God can give laughter to a family that feels just completely hopeless and without, you know, they've exhausted everything that they can do, all of their techniques, and just completely fallen short of

But God is able to break through and do miracles and give birth to a son at 99 and 89 years old, 190 years old. God is able to do miracles to that degree. He still works in that same way, in that miraculous way, and brings laughter to hopeless families.

Now, we all want that, right? So, yeah, I want that. So, how do I experience this laughter in my hopeless situation? Well, again, I would highlight the three things that I mentioned as we were working our way through. We need to hear from God.

It starts with our relationship with God, our connection to God. And it started as Abraham and Sarah listened to what God said and heard from God. God is speaking and he is reaching out. And if we want to experience the laughter that God can provide, it may not be in the timeframe that we want, of course. That's the wait on the Lord part. That's the wait for the Lord part. But

But if you will begin by hearing from the Lord, you can begin that path to laughing once more, to that joy that God wants to give. As you hear from the Lord, then it comes the next step, and that is obedience. You need to then put in practice and do what it is that God calls you to do as he is speaking to you. Sometimes he's speaking to you promises, and there's nothing for you to do except for you to wait.

Sometimes he's saying, hey, I'm going to do this. And when I do, here's what I want you to do. Name your son this, circumcise him on this date. You know, he's going to give you those specific instructions and be prepared now and be resolved now that you are going to obey, even if it's not time to obey quite yet. That instruction that God has given to you, prepare your heart right now and make the decision now to obey God. And the things that he's told you to do that are in effect for right now,

then start right now. Put into practice. If you want to experience the laughter that God can give to a hopeless family, hear from God, obey God, and then wait for God to work. And even if you have to wait 25 years, it's going to be worth it. It may not happen instantly and in the moment that you want most, but God is able to come through. He will fulfill on his promises and he can bring laughter to a hopeless family.

Well, as we move on to verses 8 through 13, we continue to look at the family of Abraham and some of the drama that unfolds now as Isaac is born and begins to grow. In verses 8 through 13, we have point number two, and that is God can give direction for a complicated family. Does anybody have complicated family connections, family ties, family relationships? You know, again, sometimes we look around at our own families and we think,

You know, I can't imagine like anybody else having it this bad. You know, I can't imagine it being complex. But as you look at the life of Abraham, I mean, you could see a lot of the same family dynamics, family drama, you know, that wasn't invented with reality TV. I was thinking about because I hear it regularly because my name is Jerry. And every time I'm introduced, inevitably there would be someone who'd be like, Jerry, Jerry, Jerry, Jerry.

I never watched Jerry Springer, but apparently that's what happened on the show. And I was on the phone with a potential client last week, and we were talking for like 20 minutes. And he's all, by the way, what's your name? I said, Jerry. He's like, oh, like Jerry Springer? I was like, well, kind of, I guess. And he's like, I love that show. He tells me a whole episode, like just on laser. And I'm like, okay, you want to buy a website? You know, all the drama, all the things that we see, this was not invented in our generation, right?

This has existed from the very beginning, and there can be super complex. Cousin Mary doesn't hang out with Aunt Jo, so Christmas is going to be this way this year, and then Thanksgiving is going to be that way, and we're going to go this way on Easter, and you know, you're doing like this twister gymnastics, trying to like make all the family happy, and

Then you have, you know, this person, they separated, and there's kids from this family, and kids from that family, and kids from this other person, and then, you know, the kids, and it's just like this huge game of Twister, and it's like so complex, and so difficult, and these are fighting with these, and these get along with these, and if they're going to be there, they can't be there, and you know, there's all this complicated stuff. How do we navigate that? How do we deal with that? Well, we see

that God can help with that. Here in the life of Abraham, in Genesis chapter 21, verses 8 through 13, first of all, looking at verses 8 through 11, it says, So the child grew and was weaned, and Abraham made a great feast on the same day that Isaac was weaned. And Sarah saw the son of Hagar, the Egyptian, whom she had born to Abraham, scoffing.

Therefore, she said to Abraham, cast out this bondwoman and her son, for the son of this bondwoman shall not be heir with my son, namely with Isaac. And the matter was very displeasing in Abraham's sight because of his son. Family drama begins to unfold. It begins to develop. The child, it says, talking about Isaac, grew and was weaned. And they would throw a big celebration.

When the child, it's a big transition for them. That now the child is able to eat on his own. He's not nursing any longer. The commentator Ernst Rosenmuller says, in eastern countries, this was always a season of domestic festivity. And the newly weaned child is formally brought in the presence of assembled relatives and friends to partake of some simple food. It was a big to-do.

So today, you know, we might have a baby shower or like a first birthday party. My nephews just celebrated that in December. And, you know, it was a big to-do. There was lots to do in this big to-do. And it was like a big celebration. You know, they get to each have their own cake and they're smashing their faces in the cake, you know. And it's like this big thing. All the family comes out. All the friends come out. It's an official big, you know, thing for them this day that Isaac is weaned.

So here's Sarah enjoying a good party, celebrating, oh, my little boy is growing up. He's able to eat solid foods. But then she looks over and she sees Ishmael. And Ishmael is doing something offensive. It doesn't tell us exactly what he did, how he was mocking, but she looks over in verse 9 and she sees the son of Hagar, the Egyptian, whom she had born to Abraham, scoffing, ridiculing, making fun of

of his little brother Isaac. How shocking, right? That an older brother would make fun of a little brother on a big important day? Just can't believe that would happen, right? We don't know exactly what he was doing, but he was doing something and Sarah gets upset. Now, this is not something that, you know, this is the first time there's ever been any kind of conflict or drama between Sarah and Hagar and Ishmael. This is not new. It's maybe new to us,

But it goes back to chapter 16. When Abraham and Sarah, they didn't have kids. They were promised kids. They'd been waiting for 10 years. They didn't have any kids yet. And so Sarah tells Abraham in Genesis chapter 16, verse 2, here's my handmaiden Hagar. Why don't you take her and I'll have children through her. So you have a child with her and basically I'll adopt him. And, you know, that'll be my child. And that'll be the way that we'll be able to have God fulfill his promise. And now suddenly...

Abraham and Sarah's family is complicated. Now you have Abraham and you have Sarah, but then also you have Hagar and Ishmael. And in Genesis chapter 16, you see that there was tension right from the get-go. As soon as Hagar is pregnant, there's tension between Sarah and Hagar. So much so that Sarah is treating her cruelly and she runs away. But the Lord meets her in the desert and calls her back and says, no, no, go back. You can hang in there. They'll be okay. Go back to Abraham and Sarah.

But Hagar wanted to go, and Sarah wanted her gone. And now they've been living in this situation for some time, and now Sarah has her own son. Think about that. It's not a foreign concept to us, right? I mean, there is a certain dynamic that comes when you have your own child, and then there's stepchildren involved. There is tension. There is drama. It's complicated. And you've got the family right there. So the mom...

I mean, you just try to picture that a little bit. So the mom of your stepchild is there living with you. And, you know, there is this tension, this drama that takes place. And Sarah looks in the midst of that context and she sees Ishmael scoffing. She sees him making fun.

And it puts her over the edge. In verse 10, she says to Abraham, cast out this bondwoman and her son. For the son of this bondwoman shall not be the heir with my son, namely with Isaac. Sarah is upset. Get rid of them, Abraham. Get them out of here. They will not stay with us any longer. You must send them on their way. Now, what was Ishmael doing that would offend her and upset her so much?

I don't know. I'm not going to try to speculate, but just understand Ishmael by this time as a teenager, what kind of mocking and scoffing could a teenager do that would be offensive? I think we could all imagine quite a bit of things. And Sarah says, that's it. You're out of here. That's just the final straw. We are not going to put up with this any longer. Abraham, you get rid of your son. Send him away.

And in verse 11, we see his side. It says, the matter was very displeasing in Abraham's sight because of his son. Now, here's Abraham attached to Ishmael. He's been living with Ishmael for 13 years. That's his son. Sarah says, get rid of him. But that's my son. That's my boy. I mean, he's finally old enough we can play catch together. Do you want me to get rid of him now? Like, how am I supposed to do that? Have you ever felt trapped between two family members? You know,

One ropes you in and you take my side. We're against that one. That, you know, that's the enemy. And the other side's trying to rope you into their side. No, you're on my side and, you know, they're the enemy. And there's this tension. There's this pull and this push and there's this complexity and drama. Here's Abraham displeased, distressed. How can I send my son away? I wonder how many nights Abraham spent on the couch over this whole situation, you know, like

Sarah is upset with him. Hagar can't be happy with him. Abraham's in turmoil. What am I going to do? How am I going to deal with this? And again, this is not, we may not have the exact scenario, but we're all familiar with these kinds of situations where there are these complications. And here we are in the middle. And how do we handle that? What do we do in the midst of that? Well, as we go on, we see that what Abraham does is he hears from God.

In verse 10 or verse 12, it says, but God said to Abraham. Abraham is calling out to God and he is hearing from God. God says, do not let it be displeasing in your sight because of the lad or because of your bondwoman. Whatever Sarah has said to you, listen to her voice for in Isaac, your seed shall be called. Yet I will also make a nation of the son of the bondwoman because he is your seed.

So as Abraham is in turmoil and he's distressed and he is not sure what to do and how to handle this and there's pressure on both sides, he's calling out to God and then he hears from God. And what does God say? God says, listen to your wife. And all the wives said, amen. Listen to your wife.

Every husband knows, Ephesians 5.22, wives, submit to your own husbands as to the Lord. And that verse is often quoted, but husbands, we often forget verse 21, just right above it says, submitting to one another in the fear of God. And this is what God says to Abraham, listen to your wife. I know you're distressed, Abraham. I know this is not what you wanted. This is not the way that you would choose, but you need to listen to your wife in this case. Now, that doesn't mean that that's always the case.

Because I'll remind you back to Genesis chapter 16, verse 2, it was Sarah who said, hey, why don't you take Hagar and have a child through her, and then we'll have kids and we'll fulfill all of God's promises that way. So Abraham shouldn't have listened there, but should listen. Now, how in the world can you tell the difference then? Well, that comes back to hearing from God. That's the point. God says, hey, in this case, Abraham, your wife is right.

and you need to listen to her. You may not like the source, but that's me speaking to you. In Ephesians 5.21, when it says submitting to one another in the fear of God, it's in the broader context, not just of the family, but of the church, that God many times will use people around us to speak to us, and we need to hear from God and recognize that many times that is, it's brought to us in the form of people around us, and we always need to

allow God to direct us that way and to check in with him and allow him to redirect if that's not what he wants, but to learn to hear his voice and to learn to recognize that this message that the person next to me is sharing, it's not just random facts, it's not just random information, but it's God speaking to me. And here in the midst of this very complex and difficult situation, Abraham hears from God. And then you know what he does? He obeys God.

We'll see that in the verses that follow. Abraham does what God says to do it. And that's really important to note because it's very clear this is not something that Abraham wants to do. This wasn't his idea. It's not his choice. Yes, I want to send Ishmael away. I've been waiting for this opportunity for 13 years. You know, yeah, get out of here. That's not Abraham. Abraham's heart is breaking. He's being torn. But God says...

Your wife is right. You need to send them away. And so what does Abraham do? He obeys God and he sends them away. We'll see that in just a moment. But you see that obedience in the midst of the displeasure, in the midst of the distressing. As we face these kinds of complicated, difficult family situations and family ties and pressure from different sides and we need to be calling out to God and hearing from God but also willing to

to do what God says, even when it's not what we want, but doing what God says because he knows what's best and trusting him with that. Listen to what Jesus said in Matthew 10, verse 37. He said, "'He who loves father or mother more than me "'is not worthy of me. "'And he who loves son or daughter more than me "'is not worthy of me.'"

Here's what we need to remember and be mindful of in the midst of these family difficulties and situations, that our first priority is to love God first. Love God the most. And if you love anybody else, including your own parents or including your own children or anybody else, more than you love God, Jesus says, you're not worthy of me. You must love God first.

And when God gives you instruction that you'd rather not do, this is my family. I don't want to say goodbye to them or I don't want to go there with them. You know, maybe sometimes the dividing is like, oh no, I don't want to do that. And sometimes it's, well, you're going to live together. Oh no, I don't want to do that either. You know, whatever the case may be, however God may be leading, whether it's a separation or a provision or a taking away or a doing something together or whatever the case may be,

We must love God first and most. And that means obeying him when he speaks to us about our family situations. God can give you direction for those complicated family situations, but be ready. As you call out to him and seek to hear from him, be ready to obey him. You remember the priest Eli back in the book of 1 Samuel? He was a priest. His sons were priests and they were involved in the priesthood, but they were wicked and Eli would not deal with it.

And God came on the scene. He rebuked Eli and he said, look, you honor your sons more than me because you won't deal with their situation and their sin. You love them more than you love me. God says, you must love me first. And that means you're gonna be obedient when you hear from me. And so we see Abraham hear from God. We see Abraham obey God.

And then we see Abraham wait for God because in verse 13, it says, yet I will also make a nation of the son of the bond woman because he is your seed. God gives Abraham another promise. And Abraham, as he goes forward in obedience, he trusts God and he waits for God to fulfill that promise that God is going to bless Ishmael and that he is going to become a nation, that he is going to be established. And Abraham now is going to go forward in obedience and entrusting Ishmael to God because

waiting for God to be faithful to his promises. Well, moving on now to verses 14 through 21, we finish up with point number three, and that is God can give insight to help a desperate family. Here as we move forward now, Abraham is going to be sending off Hagar and Ishmael, and now we're going to kind of shift gears a little bit and focus on these two as we look at this final point. And

And how God can provide insight in the midst of their desperation, in the midst of their dire situation, God is going to be able to show up and provide the answers and the direction that they need. Verse 14 says, So Abraham rose early in the morning and took bread and a skin of water, putting it on her shoulder and gave it and the boy to Hagar and sent her away.

Then she departed and wandered in the wilderness of Beersheba. Verse 15. And the water in the skin was used up. And she placed the boy under one of the shrubs. Then she went and sat down across from him at a distance of about a bow shot. For she said to herself, let me not see the death of the boy. So she sat opposite him and lifted up her voice and wept. Here in verses 14 through 21, we see

Hagar and Ishmael come to a place of desperation. They are in a life and death situation. Now, as we begin to talk about this passage, I would start by asking, hey, do you have any difficulty with this passage at all? Anybody have a hard time accepting this passage and agreeing with what's happening here? As you look at Abraham sending off Hagar and Ishmael,

Is that like, okay, cool, yeah, good idea. Yeah, just send them off. Or do you kind of wrestle with that and say like, wait a minute here. Like, what about providing for your own? And what about taking care of your family? And is this the Bible advocating for like not paying child support? You know what I mean? Like not taking care of your family? What if Abraham came to you for counsel at this point? He's like, you know, Dave, I was thinking, I'm just gonna give him a loaf of bread and a bottle of water and send him off. You know, what do you think? Does that sound like a good idea? Yeah, go for it. Bottle of water, that's enough.

You wrestle with that a little bit? Is that difficult? It's okay if it is. It is a little bit of a difficult situation. But there's a couple things that we need to keep in mind. There's important factors that kind of change the scene perhaps from what you're imagining in your mind. First of all, we need to recognize that Hagar is a slave. Now that's very different for our culture, for our community, right? Like we're not immersed in that type of situation. We don't see that

But that was the normal thing for them and for their culture. And in this case, what is happening is Hagar is being set free. She's being set free from her bondage. She is called the bond woman because she's in bondage to Abraham and Sarah. She is their servant, their slave.

And her freedom is a valuable thing. This is not, you know, an abandonment issue. This is a being set free type of situation. This was a valuable thing that she is being given. There was some real advantages to that. There were some real benefits that she was receiving that may not be apparent in our reading of it and our first understanding of it. Secondly, there's another important factor to consider. And that is at this time,

You might be picturing, you know, Hagar out in the wilderness carrying her little five-year-old boy, right? Trying to carry, you know, all the food and everything. And she's like, gets tired and she lays him under a bush and like, I can't watch him die. So I'm going to go over here. And you know, that might be what you're picturing, right? Ishmael is an adult. He's not a five-year-old boy. Think about the timeline. Going back to Abraham in the beginning, Genesis 12, he was 75. Genesis 16, when he gives birth to Ishmael, he's 86, right?

These are all specific ages that God mentions. In Genesis 17, he's 99 when he's given the promise of Isaac, which means that Ishmael is 13 years old when God tells Abraham, I'm going to give you a son through Sarah. And that's going to happen this time next year. So then Abraham is 100 years old when Isaac is born, which makes Ishmael 14 years old at that time. And now this event is happening after Isaac is weaned.

He's finished nursing. He's moved on to solid foods. Now, that indicates a time of anywhere between two to five years as far as Isaac's age is concerned. Things were a little bit different for them and their culture, right? They didn't have access to the baby foods that we have access to. And so, you know, they would tend to nurse for quite a bit longer than we might see as common today. Most

Bible scholars kind of settle on the age of three is kind of the traditional norm. But it, you know, depended on the needs of the child and what was going on. But assuming about three years old, that makes Ishmael about 17. At the youngest, he was 16. At the oldest, he might have been even 19 or 20, but he's probably about 17 years old. This is the time for him to grow up. This is part of the reality. Children have to grow up.

They do have to move on and learn to provide for themselves. And they have to learn to have their own relationship with God and trust God to provide. I like what Albert Barnes, the commentator, said about that. He says, their departure did not imply their exclusion from the privileges of communion with God. It was only their own voluntary rejection of God and his mercy, whether before or after their departure, that could cut them off from the promise of eternal life.

Now, this is important because for us who've been around the church, we've, you know, this account is familiar to us and we've known about this. And many times it's kind of, like, kind of described in a negative way. Like, you know, oh yeah, Ishmael and all his descendants, they've always been enemies of Israel and, you know, kind of painted with this dark, you know, concept, this dark idea. But

But this is not an abandonment by Abraham. It's not an abandonment by God. This is an entrusting to God. And God is still working in their lives and in their midst and seeking to develop a relationship with them and that they would walk with him. Now, later on, his descendants do become the enemies of Israel, but that's by their choice. It's not because God just, you know, cast them on and said, well, forget about those guys, you know, that's the son of the flesh.

No, no, those are illustrative things and they're useful for illustration, but they don't speak to God's care for Ishmael or Abraham's care for Ishmael. This is not an abandonment case. This is a case of, well, it is time to move on. Now, it is a difficult situation and complex no matter which way you cut it. It doesn't make it like, oh yeah, it's easy. Okay, yeah, no problem. Move out then.

No, no, it's still tough, but understand and remember that the reason why they're in this situation is because back in Genesis chapter 16, Abraham and Sarah decided we're going to try to fix this ourselves, and they didn't wait for God. They tried to fulfill the promise on their own and took matters into their own hands, and that is the reality for much of the complicated, difficult family situations that we face today. It's

It's things that we've brought upon ourselves. And man, we make a mess and we make a wreck. And there's all these, you know, things that are the havoc that is brought after our decisions to pursue the lives that we wanted to pursue. But God can step into the midst of that and begin to make the most of it. And so he's going to be at work here in the life of Ishmael and Hagar.

But it starts as they find themselves in a desperate place. Again, in verse 15, it says, Here she is, completely devastated, out in the wilderness,

She's probably been wandering around for some time, trying to find a well, trying to find water, trying to find the resources. She's desperate. It's come to the point that Ishmael, he's no longer able to just journey with her, and he just collapses. She kind of like sets him up so he's got some shade at least, but that was all that she could do. There was nothing more that she could do than just try to put a little shade over his face.

And she is so desperate at this point, it's a given, for sure, he's gonna die. I can't watch this. And she goes a little bit of a distance away. How desperate do you think she is? How devastated, how downtrodden do you think she is? And so she wept, lifted up her voice and wept. I'm sure you have somewhat of an experience of how hard it is to be helpless when someone that you love is hurting. You know what it's like to have someone hurt

Again, probably in your family. That's where this often takes place. And there they are, just wrecked, just devastated, just, and you're like trying to like give them a little shade. And it's just, it's so painful. You can't even watch just what's happening and what's unfolding. It's so hard. It hurts you because you can't help, because you can't provide what is needed, because you can't take care of that one that you love so greatly that is right there.

And so here she goes a little bit off and she just is broken. She weeps. But now God's going to show up and he's going to meet their needs. Verse 17, and God heard the voice of the lad. Then the angel of God called to Hagar out of heaven and said to her, what ails you, Hagar? Fear not, for God has heard the voice of the lad where he is. Arise, lift up the lad and hold him with your hand.

for I will make him a great nation. Then God opened her eyes and she saw a well of water. And she went and filled the skin with water and gave the lad a drink. God shows up. He opens her eyes. Here's the water. It was probably right there, you know, right near her. She's been wandering around trying to find a desperate loss. Can't find it. Can't help it.

her son who is about to die. And yet when God opens her eyes, it's been right there all along. It's right there in front of you. You just haven't been able to see it. But God shows up and he gives that insight to a family that is desperate, that is on the brink of extinction, to be wiped out completely. But notice, very important in this passage, notice who it is that God heard.

In verse 16, it tells us that she lifted up her voice and wept. But then in verse 17, it says, and God heard the voice of who? Of the lad. God heard Ishmael. It's not that God couldn't hear Hagar. It's not that God didn't hear Hagar. In fact, in chapter 16, when Hagar ran away, God met her in the wilderness. God, he knew how to get a hold of her. He knew how to speak to her. She knew how to hear from him. That was established.

But you know who didn't have a connection with God yet? Ishmael. And it took this situation where Ishmael was previously more of a rebellious state, scoffing at Isaac, ridiculing the promises of God. And he was not in a position to be like, I'm going to walk with God. I'm going to go forward and learn of him. And you know, that was not where Ishmael was. But through this wilderness, through this situation,

Ishmael now is brought to the point that he calls out to the Lord and God hears the voice of the lad. You see, the failure to get water, it's not Hagar's failure, but God was at work and he was developing this situation because Ishmael needed to learn to call out to God and that God would respond when he called out to him.

In verse 17, God heard the voice of the lad. And then at the end, he tells Hagar, or God tells Hagar, fear not for God has heard the voice of the lad where he is. Ishmael was not completely, you know, passed out when Hagar left. And so here he is laying on the ground, sees his mom, you know, try to put a little shade over his face and then like walk away just weeping. And I guess we're going to die. And it was finally at that point that Ishmael,

cries out to God. This is a very important point that God was waiting for Ishmael to call out to him. And it was only when Ishmael called out to him that God showed Hagar, the water's right here in front of you. The answer is right here. The solution, the provision, it's right here. It was then when God opened her eyes in verse 19. This is important to understand because as we talk about God giving insight to help a desperate family,

Listen, our hearts break. We see others in pain. We want to help. And sometimes we have the means and the resources to help. Sometimes we have the ideas. Oh, this is what you can do to help. But we need to be careful because it might be that God is allowing this situation because they need to learn to call out to God.

They need to learn that when they call out to God, that God will respond, that he will hear their cry, that he will provide. And we need to be careful that we don't rush in ahead of God and give them an escape before they reach that point. Now, that also means we don't want to go the other way and be like, well, I'm not going to respond. We don't want to have a hardened heart either, but

Here God says to Hagar, he speaks to Hagar. He opens her eyes. He shows her, here is water. Go grab your son, grab his hand, lift him up, bring him. He's going to be a great nation. I'm going to do a work. God shows her how to minister to him, how to support him and how to meet his need. But it's only when he comes to the point of calling out to God. We would love to help way before that. We would love for it that they didn't have to come to that point.

But God allows it to go to that point because that's what's required for the work that needs to be done. Notice what it says in verse 20. So God was with the lad and he grew and dwelt in the wilderness and became an archer. Here you see a turnaround. There's a revival that happens here for Ishmael. He was a scoffer. He was a ridiculer. He was not one who fit in with the house of faith with Abraham and Sarah. But now in his desperation, he calls out to the Lord saying,

And now God was with the lad. He grows up. He becomes an archer. In verse 21, he dwells in the wilderness of Paran. His mother took a wife for him in the land of Egypt. He goes on. He grows up. He develops. And he is walking with God. And God is with him.

Don't let that negative kind of view skew the account. He's with the Lord and the Lord is with him in the same way that God was with Joseph in Genesis 39 verse 2. The Lord was with Joseph. And we recognize that. We're familiar with that. The Lord was with Joseph just like the Lord was with Ishmael. Just like the Lord was with Joshua in Joshua chapter 6 verse 27. So the Lord was with Joshua and his fame spread throughout all the country.

God was with Joshua just like he was with Ishmael, just like he was with each of the judges. In Judges chapter 2 verse 18, it tells us the Lord raised up judges for the nation of Israel and the Lord was with the judge and delivered them out of the hand of the enemies all the days of the judge. In the same way that God was at work and walking and ministering and speaking and leading the judges, he was working and at work in Ishmael's life and

Just like he was working in Samuel's life in 1 Samuel 3.19. So Samuel grew and the Lord was with him and let none of his words fall to the ground. It was this very situation that often we can look at it and we go, oh, that's like a horrible story. What a crazy abandonment case. But it was actually what was needed for Ishmael to have his own relationship with God, to call out to the Lord and to walk with God.

God can give you insight to help a desperate family, a desperate family member, but let it be the Lord. Hear from God, just like Hagar heard from the Lord. Let God show you what it is he wants you to do and then obey God and wait for God and trust God because God told Hagar too, he's going to become a great nation. There's going to be some fulfillment of promises that I've given to you.

And Hagar trusted God. She went and she grabbed Ishmael. She lifted him up. She brought him to the well. She acted out when God spoke to her. She wanted to help much sooner, but she just had nothing. But that was by God's design. As hard as that was, as painful as that was, this was what was necessary for Ishmael at rock bottom on his back to call out to God. That Ishmael himself would hear from God and obey God and wait for God.

So this morning, I would encourage you, we see a few examples here of family situations. There's many more that you've probably seen and maybe are experiencing now in your own family. But listen, God can help broken families. Families that are shattered, families that are strained, families that are divided, families that are squished together when they don't want to be, families that have all kinds of issues. God can help broken families. Giving laughter to

to a family that thought they would never laugh again, giving direction for these incredibly complex and difficult and tense situations, and giving insight to help those who are in desperate need of a miraculous work of God. And we can see that happen in our families. We can be part of that work by hearing from God, by learning His voice.

And then taking what he says and putting it into practice and living it out. Not just doing what we think is best, not just doing what we want necessarily, not just doing what our wife wants necessarily, but doing what God wants as he is speaking to us. And then waiting for God, not trying to do things in our own strength, in our own resources, in our own power, but letting God fulfill his promises and his timing. And maybe we have to wait 25 years and we'd rather not,

but it's worth the wait for God to come through. He will fulfill the promises. He will do the work. Hear from him, obey him, and wait for him to do that work. Let's pray. God, I pray for each one of us and the families that are represented here. And Lord, you have established us as your ambassadors to those families. And Lord, we do want to see our families be blessed. We do want to see our families be

our family members, Lord, walk with you. We want to see them know you and hear from you. And so, Lord, I pray that you would help us to be your agents, to be those who would hear your voice. I pray that you would speak to each and every one of us, God, about how we can best represent you and shine your light and share your love.

to our own family members. And Lord, many times those are the most difficult situations and the most difficult relationships. But Lord, you can work even in the midst of that. Help us, Lord, to not just give up on our families, but Lord, to trust you, to hear from you, and to do what you put upon our hearts. God, I pray for those who are desperate and in need of that miraculous intervention. Lord, I pray that you would open their eyes, that they would call out to you.

And Lord, if we can be involved in the rescue, if we can be involved in the bringing the water in that last moment, Lord, we would love to be part of that. Lord, we would love to be part of you meeting those needs. And so we present ourselves to you and invite you to do that work. Lord, if we're the ones on our back looking up and about to die, I pray that you'd help us not to be stubborn and proud, but help us to call out to you.

and to wait for you and trust and know that you will come. Lord, you will provide. You will be faithful to your word. Lord, I pray for those who are caught in between two family members, facing the pressure of one who wants one thing and the other who wants another thing and such a difficult decision and conflict within as well over it. Lord, I pray that you would give wisdom and direction. Lord, that we would know what your will is. And Lord, that we would love you enough

to be bold and to carry out your will above our own and above all others around us and in our family. Lord, I pray for the hopeless, for the discouraged, for the families that wonder if they'll ever be able to laugh again. I pray, Lord, that you would give them joy. Fulfill your promises, Lord. Fulfill your word, Lord, that you would bring forth the one who brings laughter, that they would be able to hear from you.

and know, Lord, that you're with them and that you are faithful to your children. And whatever other family situation, Lord, we might be involved with, I just pray that you would lead us and guide us, Lord, help us to hear from you, then to do what you say and to trust you to handle and to work in the midst of that situation. In Jesus' name we pray, amen.

We pray you have been blessed by this Bible teaching. The power of God to change a life is found in the daily reading of His Word. Visit ferventword.com to find more teachings and Bible study resources.