1 CORINTHIANS 7:1-92004 Teaching by Jerry B Simmons

Teaching Transcript: 1 Corinthians 7:1-9

AI Andrew [00:00:00]:
You are listening to FerventWord, an online Bible study ministry with teachings and tools to help you grow deeper in your relationship with God. The following message was taught by Jerry Simmons in 2004.

Jerry Simmons [00:00:13]:
So first Corinthians chapter 1, starting in verse 1, it says this. Now concerning the things of which you wrote to me, it is good for a man not to touch a woman. Nevertheless, because of sexual immorality, let each man have his own wife and let each woman have her own husband. Let the husband render to his wife the affection due her, and likewise, also the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. And, likewise, the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. Do not deprive one another except with consent for a time that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer, and come together again so that Satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self control. Verse 6.

Jerry Simmons [00:01:01]:
But I say this as a concession, not as a commandment. For I wish that all men were even as I myself, but each one has his own gift from god, one in this manner and another in that. But I say to the unmarried and to the widows, it is good for them if they remain even as I am. But if they cannot exercise self control, let them marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion. Here in 1st Corinthians chapter 7, Paul starts out, and he says, now concerning the things of which you wrote me. And a couple weeks ago, as we were looking at chapter 5, and I I mentioned that there was a previous letter that the apostle Paul had written to the Corinthians. Well, this reveals to us too that not only had Paul been writing them letters previously, but they also had been responding back to Paul. Now Paul wrote the book of 1st Corinthians while he was staying for several years at the city of Ephesus, and we find that in the book of Acts.

Jerry Simmons [00:01:59]:
And so as he's staying there several years in the in the city of Ephesus, it would have been very easy for him and and the church of Corinth to to communicate back and forth. You might know and understand that during those times, it wasn't really easy to send a letter. They didn't have the United States Postal Service, they didn't have UPS and FedEx and all those things. What did they have? Well, they just said, hey, if you're going this way, can you know, hand this to so and so as you pass by that city? And so what would happen though with the city of Ephesus and Corinth was they were on a major trade route, and so ships would constantly be going back and forth between Ephesus and Corinth. And so it'd be very easily easy for the apostle Paul and and the church of Corinth there to communicate, to write back and forth, to to stay in fellowship and understanding what was going on. And so as Paul was writing to them and they were writing to Paul, he was answering their questions. And here from here on out, in the rest of first Corinthians, he is answering some of the questions that they had written to him, some of the things that they had written and said, hey, we don't understand this, Paul. We have questions in this area.

Jerry Simmons [00:03:02]:
We have questions about this. And so here in chapter 7, he answers their question about marriage. Chapters 8 through 10, he answers their questions about Christian liberty, and what is what is it right for Christians to be able to do. In chapter 11, he answers their questions and gives them some instruction about church conduct. Chapters 12 through 14, he answers their questions about spiritual gifts. In chapter 15, he answers their questions about the resurrection of the dead, and in chapter 16, he answers their question about giving. And so the last half of this book is we've studied the first part, which was where Paul had to deal with some situations, had to, give them some instruction and tell them to correct some situations. The last part of this book, from here on out, he'll be answering their questions, the things that were upon their hearts.

Jerry Simmons [00:03:49]:
And so, I know that many of us, if you're like me, we have questions. Questions that come up in our day to day life, questions that come up in our workplace within our family, and we say, well, what does God want us to do in these situations? And so as we look through these, I know that God is going to speak to us and answer many of the questions that we ourselves had just like the church of Corinth had. Well, as you see, in chapter 7, he's talking about marriage, and it's interesting when you think about it, because Corinth was a very mixed up church. As we've been looking at the problems that Paul has had to deal with in the first six chapters, We see a lot of different things going on. We've talked about division and strife, you know, dividing the body of Christ. We've talked about how they were involved in in allowing, sexual immorality to to continue on. In fact, not only were they allowing it, but they were parading it, they were boastful about it, and saying, look how tolerant we are with this guy, and his father's wife, his stepmother. Look how tolerant we are of this sin.

Jerry Simmons [00:04:53]:
Not only that, but we talked about the body suing one another. We talked about the allowing the the flesh to dominate, the the carnal nature to to be in control in in a person's life. And so there's a lot of things that Paul had to correct. So they were really against some things and really for some other things, and they were just really mixed up. In chapter 5, we talked about remember that guy who was sleeping with his father's wife? They were parading their tolerance of sexual immorality. Right? Well, here in chapter 7, then they go, is it okay for people to get married? So on the one hand, they're saying, hey, you know, sleep around, do whatever you want, we will tolerate you. On the other hand, they're saying, we're not sure if it's okay if, you know, if you're still spiritual if you get married. And so they're very mixed up, and it was really a result of the teachings of Gnosticism, which we'll we'll talk about.

Jerry Simmons [00:05:40]:
But here in chapter 7, Paul starts to answer the question about, is it okay? What how should a relationship be between a husband and wife in marriage? He says in verse 1 of chapter 7, now concerning the things of which you wrote to me, it is good for a man not to touch a woman. It's good for a man not to touch a woman. What is Paul talking about here? You know, I've heard many pastors and even, you know, good teachers, and and when I was growing up, I I would read this verse, and I would have a different understanding of it than I do now. I would look at this, I would hear people teach, and and it would be, used out of context. It would be used to say, hey, you know, if you're dating, if you're having a dating relationship with someone, you should never hold hands. Why? Well, because it says you should not touch. And I've heard a lot of good teachers teach that, and not that that's a bad principle to teach, but it's not the verse to teach it from. Because as he's talking about here, the the things about marriage, he says, it's good for a man not to touch a woman.

Jerry Simmons [00:06:37]:
Nevertheless, because of sexual immorality, let each man have his own wife and let each woman have her own husband. And it goes on to to go with the rest as it's talking about marriage. The context of this portion of scripture teaches us and tells us that he's talking about a relationship between a married couple. Now he says it's good for a man not to touch a woman. So what does that mean? Within a marriage, what does it mean that it's good for a man not to touch a woman? Well, the word to touch is is literally well, in the Greek, it's which means to to fasten fire to something, to touch in a way that lights a fire. Now, I don't believe that Paul is saying that we shouldn't touch each other within marriage in a way that lights the fire, but what he's doing is the same thing that he did last week in chapter 6. He's quoting them. You remember in chapter 6 verse 12, he says, all things are lawful for me.

Jerry Simmons [00:07:31]:
Right? And that was a popular saying in the church of Corinth, that they said, hey, all things are lawful for me. I can do whatever I want. Well, in verse 13 of chapter 6, he also said, foods for the stomach, and the stomach's for foods. Another quote from them. The things that they were saying, the things that people were saying there in the church of Corinth. Well, people in the church of Corinth were also teaching and saying, hey, it's good for a man not to touch a woman. In other words, if you are truly spiritual, if you are a good Christian like I am, they would say, then you'll abstain from sexual relationships even if you're married because that's a sign of weakness. It shows you haven't conquered the flesh.

Jerry Simmons [00:08:10]:
It shows yada yada yada whatever. And so they would say, hey, it's good for a man not to touch a woman. And so the church of Corinth is going, hey, I don't know what to do, so they send upon and say, is it true? Is the saying true that it's good for a man not to touch a woman? Like I said, this is a result of the teaching of Gnosticism. The the Gnostics taught that the body is evil, and the two extremes of that, of the as a result of that teaching was 1 is you can do whatever you want with your body, because it's all evil anyways, it doesn't matter. Satisfy whatever cravings your body has, do whatever you want. If it feels good, do it. That that was one extreme, and that's what we see happening in 1st Corinthians chapter 5. Well, here in chapter 7, we see the other end of the of the spectrum where people would be saying, no, your body is evil, so you need to punish it.

Jerry Simmons [00:09:02]:
Don't let it have any pleasure. Don't let it have anything that would benefit it, but beat your body into submission, man. Just tear up your body. Make it make it suffer, because it's evil. And so you had these two extremes that were the result of these people who said, we have the higher learning, we have the higher knowledge. Good you accepted Jesus Christ, but let me tell you a little bit more in detail. And so they would go from one extreme to the other, they would have 2 different results depending on what you decided to do with it. Because what ended up happening was first, you'd try, okay, I'm gonna punish my body.

Jerry Simmons [00:09:35]:
I'm not gonna give in. And then you realize, hey, this is too hard. Why not believe the other way, and I can just do whatever I want, and it doesn't matter? And so like I said, Corinth was a very mixed up church, very confused. And people were saying and teaching, hey, within your marriage, don't have a sexual relationship because you need to punish your body, because your body is evil. It shouldn't have any pleasure, it shouldn't have anything of the sort. So Paul says, okay. Well, yeah. Okay.

Jerry Simmons [00:10:01]:
I see what you're saying. It's good for a man not to touch a woman, but nevertheless, in verse 2, nevertheless, that's important. Nevertheless, because of sexual immorality, he says, because of the temptation that's there, let each man have his own wife, and let each woman have her own husband. As they were teaching about sexual immorality and abstaining from it, Paul teaches against it, and he says, you know what? Because of the temptation, because of the huge doors that are opened as a result of that, it's not good. That's why there's so much sexual immorality among you, Paul says. That's why all this stuff is happening, because you're following these crazy, crack teachings. Don't be doing that. Because of sexual immorality, it's good for a man, it's better for a man to have his own wife and a wife to have her own husband.

Jerry Simmons [00:10:50]:
The results of that teaching, the results of their idea that, if you abstain, you're more spiritual, they're not good. Instead, they're opening up these huge doors that should never have been opened. They're opening up these opportunities that shouldn't be opened. Remember, Corinth was a very religious city. They had the temple member of Aphrodite, which had a 1,000 prostitutes, which if you wanted to worship this god, Aphrodite, what you would do is you would sleep with the prostitutes. And so there was all this prostitution going on, all this sexual immorality going on, and so Paul says, look it, you're in a dangerous situation. You don't wanna put yourselves in a bad spot. Because of sexual immorality, don't abstain.

Jerry Simmons [00:11:34]:
Instead, let each man have his own wife and each woman her own husband. Now, it's an important point that that's what marriage is. It's between 1 man and 1 woman, and that's what God has ordained. No matter what the courts say, no matter what our country says, eventually, that's what God's word says. That's what the Bible teaches. So the husband and wife need to be together. They need to develop their relationship together. What would end up happening if if they were following the teaching of the Gnostics is the husband or wife, depending on on who is involved in it, would come to a point where they they just decided and declared, hey, I've conquered the flesh.

Jerry Simmons [00:12:12]:
I'm a spiritual person now, and so I'm not gonna care about my my spouse's needs or or weaknesses. I'm just I'm gonna I'm gonna abstain. I'm gonna move on. I'm gonna continue forward and and show, you know, everybody how spiritual I am, but Paul says, no, it's not good. Don't don't do that. We need to put the needs of each other first within our marriage. That's what we're called to do as as husbands and wives, is to put each other's needs first. So because of this dangerous situation, because of what was going on, Paul says, and he repeats himself 3 times in 3 different ways.

Jerry Simmons [00:12:44]:
And I think it's to get his point across to make sure, hey, there's no other way to interpret this. There's no other way to look around it. This is what I'm saying. Verse 2, he says, let each man have his own wife and let each woman have her own husband. Verse 3. Let the husband render to his wife the affection due her, and likewise the wife to her husband. Verse 4. The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does.

Jerry Simmons [00:13:06]:
And likewise, the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. Three times, he says it 3 different ways, that do not abstain, but instead, let each man have his own wife. Let each man render the affection that's due to his wife. Spend time together, develop your relationship together, not just sexually, but in all points, emotionally, physically, spiritually. We need to develop our relationships together as husband and wife. And so Paul says, what you're doing is you're causing a division with your own marriage now, because you're putting your own needs and desires first. You're causing a division, you're separating yourselves, and you're giving the enemy an opportunity to attack. But instead, render the affection due to each other.

Jerry Simmons [00:13:53]:
Spend time with each other. He says, physically, the wife doesn't have authority over her her own body, and before the guys go, yes, guys, you don't have authority over your own body either. We're to meet each other's needs at our own expense. That's what we're called to do, to meet each other's needs. And so whatever it is that we need to do, we need to render the affection due. We need to spend time together as husband and wife. We need to develop our relationship. And so Paul is coming against this teaching of the Gnostics, of abstaining, of keeping away from each other, and he's saying, no, no, no.

Jerry Simmons [00:14:27]:
Spend time together, devote time together, devote time and set aside time that you will be able to develop your relationship as a husband and wife. In verse 5, he goes on to kinda continue the same thought. He says, do not deprive one another except with consent for a time. Do not deprive one another except for except with consent for a time that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer, and come together again so that Satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self control. Paul says, do not deprive one another. Don't hold back from one another. Don't abstain. There's only one time, he says, when you can, and that's with the exception of if it's with mutual consent, if you both agreed upon it.

Jerry Simmons [00:15:13]:
Because if you deprive one another and you haven't both agreed upon it, what you're doing is you're hurting the other person. You're disabling them. You're you're giving them, really, you're making them disabled. You're giving Satan an opportunity to to come in, to seduce, to attack, to crush them. It would be as if I took pastor Sysco, and I took him to a bar, and I said, hey, you need to stay inside here all day for the next couple weeks and, and not drink anything. Well, knowing pastor Sysco and knowing his background, that would be a potential weakness. That would be setting him up for a fall, and Paul says the same thing. Because of the present situation, because of the crisis and the place where you're at, you don't wanna set your husband, your wife up for a fall.

Jerry Simmons [00:15:57]:
You don't want to deprive one and put them in that situation unless it's with consent, he says. Now this is an important exception. There's only one time, he says, when it's allowed, when when it's good, and it's when both have agreed, which Think about this. If he says, except with consent. Right? This is the most important part. Except with consent means that there must be a conversation that takes place. You guys gotta talk about it. And if you both agree upon it, if you talk it through, if you pray it through, and you're both under under the agreement that, hey, this is what the Lord's calling us to do, well, that's a different story.

Jerry Simmons [00:16:35]:
But when one person just decides, hey, this is how it's gonna be, this is what I'm gonna do, that's not good, Paul says. It's not good for you to abstain under those circumstances. But if you've talked about it, if you've had the conversation, if you've done that and you're both agreed, then it's okay. With consent, it's okay. Now, he gave 3 conditions. Accept with consent with 3 conditions. K? Number 1, you both agree. Number 2, it's for a time.

Jerry Simmons [00:17:06]:
It's for a preset time. It's not an indefinite amount of time. We'll never do it again. But instead, well, let's set aside this time. We'll make this time set apart to, and then the third thing, fasting and prayer. To fasting and prayer. When is it okay to abstain from a sexual relationship within your marriage? When those three things are met. That's what Paul says.

Jerry Simmons [00:17:32]:
When it's both agreed upon, when it's for a set time, and then also for when that time is used for fasting and prayer. But you have to talk about it. You have to communicate. And, you know, I I don't know, how how you wanna take this, and I'll let you read it and understand it yourselves, but he says, if it's for a time of fasting and prayer, and I've heard a lot of good teachers teach this, then as long as you can fast, you can abstain. So there you go. Take it or leave it. Read the word of God for yourselves. K? He says, do not deprive one another.

Jerry Simmons [00:18:10]:
Don't deprive each other, but instead, encourage each other. If you both agree, if it's for a purpose, it could very easily happen. You might have big situations happening in your life right now. You might have big decisions that you have to make. You might have a time of crisis where maybe a family member is sick or or people are hurting around you, or something is happening that the Lord's put it on your heart. Hey, we need to set aside this time for prayer and fasting. We need to set aside this time and really seek the Lord, find out His will in this situation. We need to seek the Lord for guidance, for direction, to really develop our relationship together with the Lord.

Jerry Simmons [00:18:46]:
Now it's together with the Lord. It's not separate. It's not on your own, but it's together. It's something that must be done and should be done together as a husband and wife. And so Paul says, you need to both agree, you need to do this if that's what the Lord is saying to you. But if not, if you're not doing it for a set time, if you're not doing it for the purpose of fasting and prayer, then you shouldn't be. You shouldn't be depriving one another. Well, why not? I mean, don't I have that right? Well, go back to verse 4, the husband and the wife does not have authority over their own body.

Jerry Simmons [00:19:19]:
We don't have the rights that we think we have. We don't have the rights that we would like to have. Instead, we've given our rights. We've handed ourselves over to each other. We've surrendered ourselves to the lord and to each other. That's what we're called to do as a husband and wife, so we need to abide by these things, these guidelines that Paul is giving us here. To not abstain, except with consent, except for a set time, and except for the purpose of fasting and prayer. Why? Well, he goes on in verse 5, and he says, so that Satan does not tempt you.

Jerry Simmons [00:19:51]:
Why should I not abstain? Why why should I follow these guidelines? Why should I listen to what the apostle Paul is saying here? Well, for the main reason of so that Satan does not tempt. So that Satan does not tempt. What's so bad about a little bit of temptation? It might do us some good. Right? It might build some resolve in us. Well, no. It's not good. Temptation is not good in any sense. What Satan wants to do is destroy your marriage.

Jerry Simmons [00:20:24]:
That's what he wants to do. Realize and understand that Satan hates you. He hates me. He hates the work that God is doing in your life. He hates the things that God has done. He hates the the things that you're learning and understanding. He hates the fact that you're going to church, that you're raising a godly family. He hates the the idea of you developing a relationship together with the lord, and strengthening each other, and helping each other, and encouraging each other in your walks with the lord.

Jerry Simmons [00:20:49]:
He hates it with a passion. He'll do whatever it takes to to tear you apart, to tear your marriage apart. So Paul says, don't deprive each other. Don't keep yourself from each other. Don't hold back because if you do, you're giving an opportunity to Satan. You might remember in 1st Peter chapter 5 verse 8 where Peter says that well, let me just read it to you. 1st Peter chapter 5 verse 8. He says, be sober, be vigilant, because your adversary, the devil, walks about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour.

Jerry Simmons [00:21:25]:
You know, Satan is not the kind of guy, the enemy doesn't come against you to just put a little speed bump in your day. He doesn't wanna just cause a little hiccup and just watch, you know, the strife. He doesn't wanna just, you know, start a little problem and just kinda watch the argument. You ever do that? You know, you argue with someone just for the fun of it, just to see their reaction, and they get all flared up and stuff. I never do that. But but that's not Satan's goal. He doesn't just enjoy the little spot. No.

Jerry Simmons [00:21:53]:
No. No. He his desire, his goal is to devour, to completely destroy, to wipe out entirely. That's what Satan wants to do. So Paul says, watch out. You don't want Satan tempting you. You don't want to allow that kind of opportunity. Now granted, it doesn't mean that, you know, there's not gonna be temptation otherwise.

Jerry Simmons [00:22:12]:
Yeah. Even if they're you're involved with each other, there still will be temptation. There will always be temptation, but Paul says, guard yourself. Don't give don't put yourself in a situation where it's worse. Why put yourself in that predicament? No. Don't do that. Don't deprive one another. In Satan's hands, sex is a weapon.

Jerry Simmons [00:22:33]:
It's a weapon to destroy your life, and it's a weapon to destroy my life. If you're here this morning and you're not married, it's a weapon against you. It's a weapon that Satan wants to use to bring you down, to tear you up, to rip you off, and to mess up all future relationships that you might have. If you're here this morning and you are married, it's a it's a weapon in your marriage, in Satan's hands. To abstain, it's a weapon. It's a destroying weapon. It's a destructive weapon. To be used outside of marriage, again, it's a destroying.

Jerry Simmons [00:23:08]:
It's very destructive. So in Satan's hands, it's not good. It's never good in any case, in any circumstance, but in God's hands, when used the way God designed it, oh, it's it's a tool. It's it's beneficial. It's beautiful, because God builds relationships. He guards against sin. He develops the unity that we talked about last week. Remember in 1st Corinthians chapter 6, the union that takes place, the unity that happens, the thing that the Lord does behind the scenes spiritually, emotionally, and physically with a couple when they're involved in a sexual relationship.

Jerry Simmons [00:23:48]:
There is a union that takes place, and in God's hands, sex is a beautiful tool. And so we need to keep it in God's context. As the Apostle Paul said, don't deprive one another except for time. Do it God's way. Do it this way to guard yourself, to build up your relationship, to encourage each other, and keep it that way. If you both agree for a set time, hey, it's cool, but be very careful, Paul says. Watch out, because the enemy's out there, and he wants to destroy you. Now in verse 6, he goes on to say, but I say this as a concession, and not as a commandment.

Jerry Simmons [00:24:21]:
I say this as a concession, not as a commandment. So you say, great. It's not a command. Don't you see, Jerry? It's not a command. I don't have to abide by this. I don't have to follow this. Throughout chapter 7, you see the Apostle Paul over and over again say and distinguish between the things that the Lord Jesus specifically talked about and the things that he didn't. Paul says, look, listen to what I'm saying.

Jerry Simmons [00:24:47]:
This is my suggestion. This is my understanding of what God's plan of a sexual relationship within marriage is. This is what I understand and know to be true. The word concession here is literally with knowledge, to to know about it or to suggest with knowledge, with understanding. We do have a choice, and and Paul is saying, you do have a choice, and and we have the choice here to either believe that what he's saying here is the word of God and it's true and obey it, or we have the choice not to. And I believe that this that's why this is here. Paul gave us here the opportunity. Hey, look.

Jerry Simmons [00:25:24]:
This isn't the 10 Commandments, but he's not saying that his words are not inspired, because we don't just believe that the Ten Commandments are inspired, just the Old Testament here, but the entire word of God. In first first Timothy chapter 3 verse 16, it says the whole word of God, the whole thing is is profitable. It's useful for doctrine, for for reproof, for correction, for training in righteousness. The word of God, the Bible that you hold in your lap, in your hands is the inspired word of God. This is God's very words to you and to me. The apostle Paul says, look, this is my suggestion. This is what I know to be true. Jesus didn't specifically talk about this, and we'll look at what Jesus specifically talked about in a moment.

Jerry Simmons [00:26:12]:
But this is what God's design for marriage is. This is what it is. So it's a concession, it's not a command. We have the choice now. We can say, yes, I believe God's word, I'm gonna obey it, I'm gonna follow it, I maybe don't agree with it all the time, but I'm gonna believe and obey it. That's it's God's word. Or you can choose not to, and you can choose at your own risk. Jesus did speak about specific things regarding marriage, and we can see that in Matthew chapter 19, and we'll look at that in a moment.

Jerry Simmons [00:26:40]:
But abstaining apart from these guidelines that Paul is giving is very dangerous, he says. It's not done in love. When it's these three things, it will be edifying, it will be beneficial to your marriage, but if it's not with those three things, not with those three guidelines, it's gonna be destructive, and it's not gonna be done in love. And so we need to be very careful about how we treat our spouses. It's we need to be very careful about how we neglect or develop our sexual relationship between a husband and wife. In verse 7, he goes on to say, for I wish that all men were even as myself as I myself, but each one has his own gift from God, one in this manner and another in that. Paul says, I wish that all men were even as I myself. I wish that all men were like me.

Jerry Simmons [00:27:27]:
Now that's a bold thing to be saying, but this is what Paul says. So the question is, well, was Paul married? Was he married? Well, there's nothing very clear, to whether or not Paul was married. It's believed that he was married because he was a member of the Sanhedrin, and that was one of the requirements, is that you be a married person. And tradition has that his wife, who he had, left him when he became a Christian. Because if you look back in the book of Acts, you see Paul, he was from Tarsus, all of Tarsus, and he went to Damascus after his conversion and stayed there for for several years. And so it's believed that his wife left him when he made a stand for Jesus Christ and then went on into to the ministry and went on into the mission field like we see. And so Paul says, I'm not married right now. I'm I'm single in in my state right now.

Jerry Simmons [00:28:21]:
And so Paul says, I I wish that all men were even as I myself. I wish that all men were single. Right? Praise the Lord. How? For that? That's no. I'm just kidding. Paul says, I wish that everybody was like me. But he goes on, and he he ends that thought. He says, but each one has his own gift from God, one in this manner and another in that.

Jerry Simmons [00:28:40]:
Paul says, it's a good thing to be single. It's a good thing to be on your own and and not married. But, he says, that's not for everybody. Each one has their own gift. God gives one person this gift and another person that gift. We're we're comfortable with that. We're used to that, talking about, like, the gift of prophecy, and the gift of the words of wisdom and knowledge and teaching, and, you know, the gift of helps and stuff. We're comfortable with that.

Jerry Simmons [00:29:07]:
Well, what gift is Paul talking about here? Well, he's talking about a gift that we call celibacy, the gift of celibacy. The gift where God says, hey, you person, you individual, you don't need a spouse, you don't need a mate, but I'll give you everything that you need. I'll satisfy your needs. I'll meet your needs. I won't give you an overwhelming desire for someone of the opposite sex. I'm going to give you an overwhelming desire to serve me, to love me completely and wholeheartedly. There's certain people, there's those within the body of Christ who have the gift of celibacy, who do not need to get married, who will not get married, but instead will devote their lives entirely to the work of the Lord. And so Paul says, I wish that everybody was like that, I wish that all all people had that gift, but God gives as he sees fit.

Jerry Simmons [00:29:54]:
He gives according to his plans and according to his desires. So it's good, for those who have that gift. Now you might think, oh, man. What if I'm cursed with that gift? You don't have to worry about it. If you're thinking that way, you don't got the gift of celibacy. So you don't have to worry about it. Okay? Just relax. I see a lot of young guys stressed out right now.

Jerry Simmons [00:30:17]:
No. It's okay. Verse 8, he goes on to say, but I say to the unmarried and to the widows, it is good for them if they remain even as I am. But if they cannot exercise self control, let them marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion. Turn with me to Matthew chapter 19. Matthew chapter 19. It's right there, the first book of the New Testament, right before Mark, right after Revelation. Anybody awake? Matthew chapter 19.

Jerry Simmons [00:31:01]:
I thought it was funny. I don't know. In Matthew chapter 19, if you look at your heading of the the portion of scripture, it says marriage and divorce. This is what Jesus taught about marriage and what Jesus taught about divorce. In verse 1 of chapter 19, it says this. Now it came to pass, when Jesus had finished saying these things I'm sorry. When Jesus had finished these sayings, that he departed from Galilee and came to the region of Judea beyond the Jordan. And great multitudes followed him, and he healed them there.

Jerry Simmons [00:31:35]:
The Pharisees also came to him, testing him and saying to him, is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for just any reason? And he answered and said to them, have you not read that he who made them at the beginning made them male and female? And he said I'm sorry. And said, for this reason, a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the 2 shall become 1 flesh. So then, they are no longer 2, but 1 flesh. Therefore, what God has joined together, let not man separate. Verse 7. They said to him, why then did Moses command to give a certificate of divorce and to put her away? And he said to them, Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts, permitted you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. And I say to you, now this is important, verse 9. Whoever divorces his wife except for sexual immorality and marries another commits adultery, and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery.

Jerry Simmons [00:32:38]:
In verse 10, his disciples said to him, if such is the case of the man with his wife, it is better not to marry. K. The disciples here are flabbergasted. They're saying, what in the world are you saying, Jesus? What are you do you know what you're saying? As the Pharisees come to test and they say, is it okay for a man to divorce his wife for just any reason, for any reason whatsoever? Now the reason for the question is there were different rabbis in that day, and they would teach different things. One would say, well, hey, you know, in the case of sexual immorality, then you can divorce your wife. Others would say, hey, if she burns your food, it's okay to divorce your wife. And so they would come to Jesus and say, hey, you know, what's going on? Can can I divorce my wife just for any reason? And basically, Jesus says, no. In verse 9, he lays it out very clearly.

Jerry Simmons [00:33:31]:
He says, hey, Unless it's for sexual immorality, unless it's for infidelity, no. It's not right. You cannot divorce your wife. And if you marry someone who's divorced in that case, then that's adultery. And so the disciples are going, what? You can't put away your wife for just any reason? Well, shoot. It's better not to marry then. It's better not even to get into there because I'm gonna be stuck with her for life. I mean, that's a dangerous predicament to be in, to put yourself in.

Jerry Simmons [00:33:59]:
Not very, good caliber people. Right? Well, he says, if if it's better not to marry, but in verse 11, Jesus goes on and says to them, but he said to them, all cannot accept this saying, but only those to whom it has been given. So the disciples say it's better not to marry, and Jesus said, well, not everybody can accept that. If you can receive that, if you can accept that, then God bless you. Go forward. You know, you have the gift of celibacy. In verse 12, he goes on to say, for there are eunuchs who are born thus from their mother's womb, and there are eunuchs who are made eunuchs by men. And then this last one, and there are eunuchs who have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven's sake.

Jerry Simmons [00:34:37]:
He who is able to accept it, let him accept it. He says there are some who are able to accept it. There are some who have the gift of celibacy. There are some who can continue on and not get married, but for most, that's not the case. For most of us, God's design, God's plan for us is that we get married, that we develop a relationship with one another. Now, back in 1st Corinthians chapter 7, Paul said, I I wish that all men were as me, but God, you know, has given different people different gifts. In verse 8, he says, to the unmarried and to the widows, I say, hey. If you're unmarried, if you're a widow, it's good for you to stay just like the apostle Paul to stay in your unmarried state and use your time, use your energy to to serve the Lord.

Jerry Simmons [00:35:17]:
But in verse 9, he says, but if if you can't exercise self control, if that's not your gift, if you're not in that place where you can do that, then it's better to marry than to burn with passion. It's better to marry and get married than than fight your flesh and fight your, fight your own body for the rest of your life. Paul says, the design really is that, and the purpose is that you would be able to serve God. Now if you're able to be unmarried, you're able to remain in that state and serve the Lord, then then do it. Serve the Lord, man. Give him everything you got. But if you're gonna have to be fighting your flesh, if you're gonna be burning with passion, then it's better to get married, because you will not be doing the Lord any favors by sitting there and fighting the flesh and struggling and falling and struggling and falling and burning with passion. But he says, just get married.

Jerry Simmons [00:36:08]:
Serve the Lord in that way. Serve the Lord as God has called you to do. You might have the gift of celibacy, but you'll know if you have it because you won't have those desires. You won't be burning with passion. But if you are, then God has a different plan for you. So as the apostle Paul looks at marriage here, he says it's really very good for husband and wife to develop their relationship together. It's very good. It's important.

Jerry Simmons [00:36:30]:
It's necessary that we spend time together as husband and wife, that we spend time together emotionally, physically, and spiritually, that we develop all three of those, all those aspects. Marriage is a picture of the relationship that Jesus wants to have with us. And I share this often Well, not often, I've only done 2, but I share this at weddings, usually. I'm going to share this at weddings. How's that? Marriage is a picture of the relationship that Jesus wants to have with us. The intimacy and joy between a husband and wife is the same intimacy, to a greater degree, that Jesus wants to have with you and I. That's why he designed marriage, as a picture, so that we could have something before us that we could understand and know that's how much God loves me. That's how much Jesus wants me to spend time with him and to develop my relationship with him.

Jerry Simmons [00:37:22]:
So let's care for one another. As husbands and wives, let's care for one another. Let's meet one another another's needs and put their needs above our own. That's God's design. That's God's call to us as married couples. Now if you're not married here this morning, learn these things now. Learn these things now that they might benefit you when you do get married. Now this morning, not only are we talking about marriage, but we have the opportunity to partake of communion together.

Jerry Simmons [00:37:50]:
And if I could have the guys in the worship team come forward, I want to encourage you, because marriage is a picture of the relationship that God wants to have with you and me, then just as the apostle Paul said, do not deprive each other, but instead, make a point and spend time together. Communion is a time just like that, where we spend time with Jesus Christ, just as if we would spend time with our spouse, just as if we would spend time with each other in prayer and in supplication, and developing our relationship with the Lord, our walk with the Lord. Paul says you need to give that same attention, to give that same desire, that same amount of energy to developing a relationship with the lord. Marriage is a picture of what Jesus wants to have with you and me, and so we need to develop those things. Don't deprive Jesus. As we partake of communion this morning, you understand and you know that we're remembering, we're reflecting on what Jesus Christ did on the cross for us. We're remembering and reflecting on what he does for us and pouring out his life for us so that we could have a personal relationship with him. He sacrificed, and he put our needs before his that we might have a relationship with with him.

Jerry Simmons [00:39:06]:
That's what we must do to each other as husband and wife, but that's what he has done for us. And so communion is a time where we remember that. So don't deprive Jesus this morning. Don't hold back intimacy from him, but instead, as we partake, as we take the bread and the cup, reflect, remember, spend time with Jesus, allow him to speak to your heart. Confess any sins that you need to confess, open up your heart and surrender to him whatever needs to be surrendered, because he wants to have intimacy with you. He wants to have a loving relationship with you. So don't deprive him, but spend time with Jesus. They're gonna pass out the bread and the cup, and hold your portion, and we'll partake together.

Jerry Simmons [00:39:47]:
In the meantime, let's worship and reflect on what God is speaking to us.

AI Andrew [00:39:53]:
We pray you have been blessed by this Bible teaching. The power of God to change a life is found in the daily reading of his word. Visit FerventWord.com to find more teachings and Bible study resources.